It always starts and ends the same. Not enough. I am not enough. It is not enough. That was not enough. It was never enough to gain the one thing I wanted, but could never quite attain. Approval, maybe. Acceptance, perhaps? Love, for sure. But, I think maybe the calming hush of everything just being... Continue Reading →
Talking about rape, abortion, adoptions - also the last 20 years of my life. Don't read it if you don't want to read about yucky stuff. Go anywhere else on my blog, there's plenty.
Hoover (is this a god) Dam Sometimes it’s so much easier... to see all the things I want to hate. I want to yell at walls and converse with my carpet. The pillow and I are exploring other options.... But in the shower, sometimes I swear - I caught a glimpse of god. In between... Continue Reading →
My eyes are a wormhole Let them take you deep inside I'll reveal all the secrets That my smiles like to hide Let them take you on a journey Into my flesh sealed cave The dark is only scary if you forgot to bring a flame Do you see my blue skies Or do... Continue Reading →
The hydra is finished I modify my appearance with important events. I celebrated my driver's license with getting my cartilages pierced (and literally starting to date the dude who would become the father of the girl represented by my left shoulder) A tattoo goes on to mark something for me. (Literally, no shit Sherlock) Figuratively,... Continue Reading →
...Instead of running with anxiety, I’m questioning it. “What is this [discomfort of whatever form] saying to me?” Has been more helpful then “I’ve ruined everything and I am a worthless idiotic sack of shit” (believe it or not!) Earlier today, I did it and then went to meditate, and just now I did it and realized I needed to flop for a few minutes.
In two weeks, we are on the road to a new home. In two weeks, we officially say goodbye to all the familiar and blow our comfort zone into the ether. I keep feeling like our little troupe is a bunch of badasses. I’m so grateful our family chose each other because I can’t imagine this journey with anyone else. My greatest teachers and loves. My best friends.
Well, the black and grey is. Next step is coloring the eyes and pops of color in the flowers. I was going to leave that for now, but instead, I'll go do that next week for a couple hours. This was about an hour and a half, I didn't even have enough time to fall... Continue Reading →