I had a panic attack last night because the counters were dirty. There I was shaking, heart trying to climb out of my chest ala Alien, and my brain running away in storyland. Because the counters were dirty. Initially, because I’m human, I was pissed. Like, “this? This is the hill we’re dying on today?... Continue Reading →
If you asked me, (no one did) the hardest part of depression is admitting to yourself that you’re depressed. Following the woman in a black dress analogy, she doesn’t announce herself. She doesn’t even make herself at home. She silently climbs on your back and begins whispering in your ear. Her whispers become the painted... Continue Reading →
I’m 37 tomorrow. Last night, I realized that 3+7=10=1 in numerology. 36 is 3+6=9. Aside from the ability to do basic math, (I’m a big kid now) in astrology, 9 is about endings, and 1 is about beginning. New cycle. New start. In the tarot, 1 is the magician card - the master of the... Continue Reading →
Sterilize Sterile smiles, virile lies I’m getting better, my soul has died It is an illness It is insane It is my heaven It is my grave They say it’s catching Like I’m a cough They say I’m crazy I say, so what? Starry eyes, eerie cries Into the heavens I have soared I’ve danced... Continue Reading →
The sneaky and slithering s crawling on your tongue tinged with bile and a remembrance a time when lies were little and white your body betrayed your mind A word you couldn’t utter until your tongue swelled to the point of release the ick of finishing a word you never wished to say Like choking... Continue Reading →
Talking about rape, abortion, adoptions - also the last 20 years of my life. Don't read it if you don't want to read about yucky stuff. Go anywhere else on my blog, there's plenty.
Hoover (is this a god) Dam Sometimes it’s so much easier... to see all the things I want to hate. I want to yell at walls and converse with my carpet. The pillow and I are exploring other options.... But in the shower, sometimes I swear - I caught a glimpse of god. In between... Continue Reading →
This is a poem I wrote over the summer as my best friend created an amazing mural. When you close your eyes, what do you see? The glistening pools of infinity, Or are you mourning upon a desolate sea? Where do you come from? Who is your home? Where is the space between you... Continue Reading →