Depression and little black dresses

If you asked me, (no one did) the hardest part of depression is admitting to yourself that you’re depressed. Following the woman in a black dress analogy, she doesn’t announce herself. She doesn’t even make herself at home. She silently climbs on your back and begins whispering in your ear. Her whispers become the painted... Continue Reading →

37

I’m 37 tomorrow. Last night, I realized that 3+7=10=1 in numerology. 36 is 3+6=9. Aside from the ability to do basic math, (I’m a big kid now) in astrology, 9 is about endings, and 1 is about beginning. New cycle. New start. In the tarot, 1 is the magician card - the master of the... Continue Reading →

Giving teaches receiving

The benefit of waking up at 5:55 on a Saturday is the house is quiet except for Vader snoring loudly next to me. I had time to remember all the things I meant to do - the biggest thing was get donations set up at local food banks. A year or two ago, I saw... Continue Reading →

Hell is where the heart is

Talking about rape, abortion, adoptions - also the last 20 years of my life. Don't read it if you don't want to read about yucky stuff. Go anywhere else on my blog, there's plenty.

Who’s to say when the beginning ends?

The hydra is finished I modify my appearance with important events. I celebrated my driver's license with getting my cartilages pierced (and literally starting to date the dude who would become the father of the girl represented by my left shoulder) A tattoo goes on to mark something for me. (Literally, no shit Sherlock) Figuratively,... Continue Reading →

Soon Enough, I’ll Go…

...Instead of running with anxiety, I’m questioning it. “What is this [discomfort of whatever form] saying to me?” Has been more helpful then “I’ve ruined everything and I am a worthless idiotic sack of shit” (believe it or not!) Earlier today, I did it and then went to meditate, and just now I did it and realized I needed to flop for a few minutes.

2 weeks to go

In two weeks, we are on the road to a new home. In two weeks, we officially say goodbye to all the familiar and blow our comfort zone into the ether. I keep feeling like our little troupe is a bunch of badasses. I’m so grateful our family chose each other because I can’t imagine this journey with anyone else. My greatest teachers and loves. My best friends.

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