The hardest part about depression is realizing you’re depressed. We all use words to deceive ourselves. It’s not depression, I’m not depressed I’m just like … miserable and I don’t know why. I just know it’s my fault. I’m not depressed, I’m just really tired and cranky. I’m not depressed, I just generally don’t want... Continue Reading →
Sterilize Sterile smiles, virile lies I’m getting better, my soul has died It is an illness It is insane It is my heaven It is my grave They say it’s catching Like I’m a cough They say I’m crazy I say, so what? Starry eyes, eerie cries Into the heavens I have soared I’ve danced... Continue Reading →
I’ve been in a funk lately. There was 0 creativity, 0 writing (except for endless pages of journals) and 100% feeling stuck, disconnected, uninspired. I’ve been thinking about how happy I was writing years ago and how…not happy that it’s been for years and years. I’ve been wondering if I’m just…a facade. This fake, hollow,... Continue Reading →
The past is chaos, confusion, anxiety, depression. The future is the same. Right now, there’s two feet here. Right here, there’s one breath now. And as long as I remain, I cannot create a solution to find a problem, or a problem to find me.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDkAGkd4NLc Is it possible that "there is no spoon" and mustard seed mountains are the same truth? Remember how Jesus said, "if ye had but a mustard seed of faith, ye shall move mountains"? It's a weird linguistic barrier. I don't even really know what a mustard seed looks like, I have no real context... Continue Reading →
If you Google your life, what are the results? Have you ever thought about your thoughts? Where did it come from, what is it about or why you’re even thinking it? Have you wondered if you control your thoughts or if your thoughts control you? How noisy is it in your head? Are you in... Continue Reading →
When the “inner” world becomes inquisitive, the “outer” world becomes magnificent. What color is your sky? Can you actually describe it? There’s blue, there’s light blue, there’s dark blue, but I can’t say what blue looks like to me. Nor can I see or understand what blue looks like to you. I only call it... Continue Reading →
There’s a lot of focus on MLK right now, but there was Malcolm X too. “If the white people realize what the alternative is, perhaps they will be more willing to hear Dr. King.” It’s not like the Harlem riots didn’t happen and it’s not like everything stayed peaceful. It’s not like our country came... Continue Reading →
When I started losing my mind - I mean really losing it - I learned the term Dark Night of the Soul. It helped me feel less lost. It helped me see that destruction comes before creation. Or that sometimes you do need to burn it all down to get to the new. I don’t... Continue Reading →
The sickness in our minds is a much higher mortality rate than any virus. 34 year old man takes his own life, unable to cope with self isolation I cannot imagine the hells people are trapped in. Isolated with a mind that wants you dead. He's not the first, and before this thing is over,... Continue Reading →
