Giving teaches receiving

The benefit of waking up at 5:55 on a Saturday is the house is quiet except for Vader snoring loudly next to me. I had time to remember all the things I meant to do - the biggest thing was get donations set up at local food banks. A year or two ago, I saw... Continue Reading →

When not enough was just right

It always starts and ends the same. Not enough. I am not enough. It is not enough. That was not enough. It was never enough to gain the one thing I wanted, but could never quite attain. Approval, maybe. Acceptance, perhaps? Love, for sure. But, I think maybe the calming hush of everything just being... Continue Reading →

Hell is where the heart is

Talking about rape, abortion, adoptions - also the last 20 years of my life. Don't read it if you don't want to read about yucky stuff. Go anywhere else on my blog, there's plenty.

Can you hear me, Major Tom?

My eyes are a wormhole Let them take you deep inside I'll reveal all the secrets That my smiles like to hide Let them take you on a journey Into my flesh sealed cave The dark is only scary if you forgot to bring a flame   Do you see my blue skies Or do... Continue Reading →

But, who wrote this story?

After tomorrow, all of the horizons will be unfamiliar. It made me cry, even though I can’t wait to have the mountains as my horizon, the reality of everything being unfamiliar is so intimidating. Is it really though? Questioning thoughts have opened my eyes to reality. At first, I said yes. I have a hard... Continue Reading →

Who’s to say when the beginning ends?

The hydra is finished I modify my appearance with important events. I celebrated my driver's license with getting my cartilages pierced (and literally starting to date the dude who would become the father of the girl represented by my left shoulder) A tattoo goes on to mark something for me. (Literally, no shit Sherlock) Figuratively,... Continue Reading →

Soon Enough, I’ll Go…

...Instead of running with anxiety, I’m questioning it. “What is this [discomfort of whatever form] saying to me?” Has been more helpful then “I’ve ruined everything and I am a worthless idiotic sack of shit” (believe it or not!) Earlier today, I did it and then went to meditate, and just now I did it and realized I needed to flop for a few minutes.

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