The hardest part about depression is realizing you’re depressed. We all use words to deceive ourselves. It’s not depression, I’m not depressed I’m just like … miserable and I don’t know why. I just know it’s my fault. I’m not depressed, I’m just really tired and cranky. I’m not depressed, I just generally don’t want... Continue Reading →
Sterilize
Sterilize Sterile smiles, virile lies I’m getting better, my soul has died It is an illness It is insane It is my heaven It is my grave They say it’s catching Like I’m a cough They say I’m crazy I say, so what? Starry eyes, eerie cries Into the heavens I have soared I’ve danced... Continue Reading →
Just Fucking Do It, Dammit!
Cool things have been happening. One, I started writing a poetry book with the kids. Inspired by Dr. Seuss & Shel Silverstein. The kids are illustrating it and my daughter's even adding her own poems. Two, I've been writing a lot in general. Three, I feel good about myself. Not like sniffing my armpits and... Continue Reading →
Who wrote your dictionary? Full post
Y'all haven't watched enough Jurassic Park, and it shows. What did we learn? Can man control life? Can man play god? What happens when man plays god? If we make a quick swap between dinos and viruses, I'm feeling like my weird low-key obsession with Michael Crichton and Jeff Goldblum is coming in pretty damn... Continue Reading →
Quest..I..on
Where few is too many Too many is not enough I'm caught with these answers To questions I didn't ask the more of this quest I am on I find the answers live solely in my imagination Where I am like the dust in a sandstorm Trying to say which way the wind is blowing... Continue Reading →
13 Reasons..
With everything going on right now, I thought this had merit. With the tragic loss of the great Chris Cornell, I thought this post was good to re-share. 13 reasons why I am happy, and 13 reasons why I won't harm myself. Inspired by Virtual Vomit And J-Dub 🙂 The challenge is to write 13... Continue Reading →
Picasso Loved Crack
Picasso was once quoted to say, "Find what you are good at and give it away" So I guess may-be I'll start today Throwing around words in my blasphemous play I don't know what I've got to say Here are some words stuck in my head Write! Write! I command it You can stop when... Continue Reading →
The Purpose of Pain
5 years ago, 2 people fought and 5 lives imploded. Countless others were hurt in the fallout. 4 years ago, I was continuing to be a functional alcoholic, self harming and taking out all my pain by starving myself and living on beer, a slice of ham and multivitamins. 3 years ago, I left the... Continue Reading →
On Dirty Counters and Anxiety – How to lose your shit over dumb shit (with style)
I had a panic attack last night because the counters were dirty. There I was shaking, heart trying to climb out of my chest ala Alien, and my brain running away in storyland. Because the counters were dirty. Initially, because I’m human, I was pissed. Like, “this? This is the hill we’re dying on today?... Continue Reading →