Inspired by a comment convo with Honest K. Almost a year ago – to the day, I wrote in my Live Journal about Reflecting Souls. I just re-read the post, and my first reaction was, fuck me, I used to write too long – it was 3k words! The second reaction was I’m really kind of blown away with how much I have learned since.
Call it synchronicity if you’re a Jung fan or a new age-r, call it fate, call it dharma, but there’s plenty of theories out there that coincidence is not a coincidence. I used to say, “everything happens for a reason”, but I realized that is both a cop out, and it opens the door for me to obsessively find the reason. Einstein said it best, “God does not play dice with the Universe.” A lot of people misinterpret that: he’s not talking about God in the bearded dude in the sky sense, nor is he talking about destiny. He’s actually a Dr. Ian Malcolm before dinosaur playgrounds. Chaos. Underneath all order is chaos and random. Einstein believed there were fundamental laws to govern all nature, yet if you look at Heisenberg (not the sexy chemistry teacher turned meth kingpin), he showed unpredictability. I have said it before, and I will say it again: Jeff Goldblum knows what’s up.
Instead of the idea that everything happens for a reason, it’s actually more to me that the chaos creates the order. When your life goes to complete and utter shit, it’s to allow you to rebuild. What do people have to do with this? Well, to me, the people that come into your world are part of that same random order. How many times can you look at a past bad relationship and see how much it made you grow or learn? How many times can you think of a person who changed your life forever – even if you only knew them a short while?
I’ve always held the notion we are all smudges on the same canvas of life. I find it hard to always see that because we all have pretty heavy duty egos that tell us we are our own isolated island of self. When you step back, it’s pretty hard not to see we all cause ripples in everyone’s world. A perfect example: yesterday, I left a comment on a beautiful poem. The person said I made their night better. How freaking cool is that? That’s karma in action. I’ve had encounters with people for a single day that have massively changed my life, and I have had people who have been in my life forever who I’ve come to realize are walking a very different path than me.
In both, I see the concept of reflecting souls, and also the truth that people are in your life to teach you – if you are willing to learn the lesson. I think so much weight goes to the word soulmate, as “the one” or whatever, but the truth is in the word – mate – the act of copulation, or a colloquialism for friend or partner. I’ve never thought there was only one soulmate for anyone, and I think my marriage is a testament to that. I thought Jack was forever, and while I live with him, etc. he is my best friend, not my husband. In either, he’s a mate, and we’re entwined with our three beautiful poopies. I think my cat is a soulmate, and I think my kids are soulmates. To me, we all came together as a family to teach each other and help each other reach our higher purpose.
You could also look at it as Law of Attraction – you bring in what you put out. I think that is, in a nutshell, the order of the chaos. A lot of Wu Wu crap will have you thinking if you remain completely positive, etc. you will become wealthy beyond your dreams…you could pay thousands of dollars for master classes to learn how to convert your spirituality into a pyramid scheme, and so forth. The reality is that, yes, you will attract the people in your life you need, but sometimes you need a complete dickbag of a person to snap you out of something, etc. It’s not that you weren’t positive enough, it was a teacher you needed to meet. (not to mention the whole non-dual perspective of nothing being actually good or bad…)
Gabby Bernstein wrote, “when you’re getting angry or upset with someone, stop and think what is it about me that is upsetting me?” The thing is – with everyone in your life, you see something in them that is a mirror into you. Every new relationship always comes with two people tossing baggage around like a hot potato. I’ve come to realize the things I like and do not like about people are actually what I like and do not like about myself. Sometimes, you can’t pinpoint it. You are attracted to someone who you have no surface reasons to explain, or you can’t stand someone for the same. That’s our souls guiding us through life and bringing in the souls you need.
As the world grows smaller with the internet, it has become so easy for everyone to connect. I’ve found soul sisters all around this blue and green orb. Thanks to this blog – there’s Yassy, Honest K, Courtney, and on and on who are all so much like me, it’s scary. I find, too, those I connect with tend to have the same highs and lows as me. As I’ve started my study into Reiki, it makes perfect sense. Energy, energy, energy. As with LOA, like attracts like, and we all cast energy out, and pull energy in. The people you are closest to will feed off and in your energy. This applies to your soul, too. Especially in western culture, we tend to believe we’re all a body with a soul stuck inside somewhere. Really, though, we’re all souls with bodies.
Coming back to everything happening for a reason – it is true to some degree, we’re all here to find our purpose, to teach ourselves, and to teach others. Especially in the last year or so, I’ve really seen everyone you encounter holds pieces of the same puzzle. The most casual of conversations can give lightning bolts of epiphanies or inspiration. It’s only restricted to your awareness and openness for learning. At the end of the day, we all have free will and our own paths to walk, and that’s the random. Just because you think someone is “the one” doesn’t mean they will agree. The reason why I stopped using “everything happens for a reason” is because it takes away our inherent power – choice. We’re not billiard balls getting knocked around by destiny, we’re all souls with purpose and choice. Hell, if you listen to Alan Watts long enough, we’re all sleeping gods.
The people in your life are absolutely there for a reason. Your souls reflect and resonate with one another. Your energy can raise or lower others. Your soul, intention, and energy will bring the people you need in your life, even if it seems completely random. Your awareness and openness will allow you to see why people are in your life, the lessons you need to learn (particularly if you keep having the same type of person in your life), and as Buddha described in the Even Deal, what you can teach and be taught.
To Be Continued…
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