From My Mouth

In an effort to somehow stop being a crybaby – that’s probably a harsh assessment of myself, but whatever, I’m the writer here.  I’d like to attempt to focus on things other than feeling like shit.  I’m going to attempt to add in some funny stuff.  Occasionally, I actually do make people laugh.  At least, I tell myself that.  Anyhoo, earlier today, a friend offered to bring me Dunkin.  I informed her that I had to shower first, because my legs were so hairy that I could officially make a donation to locks of love.  I am so sexy…

Yesterday, a Royal Farms opened up near me.  In the shitty suburbs, this is apparently exciting and big news.  Everyone’s been talking about how amazing their fried chicken is.  Given I love to drown my sorrows in fat, I took the kids to check out their amazing fried chicken.  The kids are like short succubi.  If you offer any sort of food, suddenly, they have to add on milkshakes or chips, etc.  Lately, I’ve been exhausted and opting for paths of least resistance.  The boys were begging for cheeseburgers, and my response was, “Whatever guys, I’m already apparently dropping 60 bucks at an upscale gas station today.”

I was trying to express some of my issues to my psychologist – namely “I don’t trust my brain anymore.” her response was a daily schedule.  I’m not sure how, exactly, scheduling my depression, self pity, and self loathing helps, but I’m glad to see she is on the case.  I’m excited to plan out my naps and existential crises.  Mental health in America is just about as funny as you can get.  Especially when you consider my psychiatrist said (during our 15 minute session where she ignored me completely) how “much better I seemed”.  I just told the woman I am more depressed then I’ve ever been in my life, and I can’t stay awake, so I’m thrilled.  Here I thought the meaning of life was cultivating your own sense of peace and happiness, but I guess severe depression and hopelessness was what I was actually on the path of.  Thanks doctors!

Last, but certainly not least, I had a really weird sex dream where I was having sex with about 30 different people, all while keeping crystals placed on my third eye.  I was smoking one of those hookah things, and I kept saying “for the greater good” and “have a better tomorrow”.  I really need to lay off all that water before bed time.

7 thoughts on “From My Mouth

Add yours

  1. Not sure where to start. I think my hairy legs could give yours a run for your money. I’m never shaving them again. And dropping serious dinero at an upscale gas station is so me 😂 What I’d really like to know is how the hell do you get 15 minutes with a psychiatrist? Seriously cuz we’re lucky to get 5 minutes tops! Enough to pass along the RX for the goods. I think I could say I’m plotting some big bad shit and instead of listening, I’d get a let’s Up the dose nod. Thank goodness for my therapist. She can’t prescribe me the goods but she listens and she understands me.

    thanks for keeping it real 😂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. LOL I love it. Well, I think I must fight for my 15 because I keep babbling about the shit the meds make me feel like while she stares bored-ly at everything else and tells me I’m wrong. I’m really glad I have a professional who can tell me about myself; lord knows I’m clueless about how my body feels and stuff. I gotta switch my providers around, my psychologist has made nothing in the way of helpful suggestions. I really want to find someone who specializes in EMDR, because I gotta figure my shit out. I’m tired of reacting to everything irrationally. If I could reduce it to like 50%, I’d be thrilled.

      As far as gas stations, I have put people through college thanks to my Wawa obsession. Every day, I have to stop and get myself a fountain coke. I don’t know why, it’s so bad for me, I’m tired of being chunky, and I sip liquified sugar. LOL

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Good help is so hard to find. Not housekeepers either. Mental health keepers. We’re in search of a good shrink but as for therapist we hit the jackpot and are never letting go. The we is me and Lulu and not the voice in my head. I say enjoy the hell out of that foundation coke. Life’s too short. Chunky is just more to love 💕


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Blog at

Up ↑

%d bloggers like this: