When depression sets in, it seems like you have been dropped in a maze
All around you, you can hear and feel happiness
But you keep rounding corners and smacking in to walls
It knocks you down, and you scream at yourself to get up
But your legs decided today just wasn’t their day
The worst part is knowing that it was okay
The worst part is feeling your smile decay
In the maze, you smell delicious food, but it turns your stomach
You can hear people laughing
your brain whispers, they’re laughing at you
So smiles and laughter make you run into those walls a little harder
They make you scream a little louder to just…fucking…stop…
When you have depression, there’s a black bird on your shoulder
It pecks you every time you try to move forward
It snatches the good from everything and feeds it to itself
While it shits on your shirt
When you have depression, you try as hard as you can
To make someone else smile
To make someone else laugh
To make someone else’s day brighter
When you have depression, all you want
is for no one else to feel the way you do
They say the black bird is the messenger of Apollo
They say it’s a sign of good fortune
I don’t know the luck in not giving a fuck
But I guess depression can make me a nicer person
I can say with truth, that I would not wish this on my worst enemy
They say what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger
I just whisper, hold on a little longer
Eventually, maybe my brain will stop begging me to kill myself
In the meantime, I’ll let that bird devour all my joy
As I practice smiling, because I’d rather try
to make the world bright, when I can’t find light
I can’t find the sun, behind the clouds
I can’t find happiness inside the maze
But, it hasn’t killed me yet
No regret
I’ll just keep…..
Leave a Reply